Blah.

It's so terribly hot these days. The air hangs heavy whenever I step out, even if it's for a minute, but not as thick as the sense of impending doom that is just THERE, perpetually, every minute of every day. I don't know what, or why, or how, or when it'll go away.
You know how when you pack your stuff to go away on a trip, and there ALWAYS always has to be something you forget? In my case, I accept that as a fact of life, but I can never rest at ease till I figure out what exactly it is that has been left behind. A book, toothpaste, a charger, i just need to know, so that uniformity prevails and I can get on with my life. Sans the omitted item, of course.
Just like that, every day can't be perfect either. Today, I was in office, working, listening to music, happy because of whatever was playing on my iPod at that time, and I realised with a shock that up till that point, the day had been pretty good. I thought hard through the events -- waking up late, listening to music, talking to mom, going to the market, driving to office, starting work -- but nothing seemed amiss. And that's when the dread came back. If something horrible hasn't happened yet, that means it's coming up, served piping hot and fresh with a side dish of despair.
This isn't me, I promise, I have been taken over by someone. I'm trying to get rid of Them.